Mrs. Noel Crane

I fell in love with the wording, the flow, the cliche in this person’s response on the Qs below.

The page source is cited at the bottom.

Q: Is he a jerk? I can’t seem to get over him.

Yes, and time heals. That said, you may always have a little twinge when you think of him, and that’s a good thing. The excitement of a first romance mingled with all that went wrong is what you get to keep with you so that in future romances, you remember to be a little wiser.

Q: Am I stupid for still having feelings for this guy even when he treated me this way?

No - the feeling may not even be for the guy, but for the potential, the relationship and the parts of yourself that have been changed now.

Q: Is he a jerk for doing these things?

Yes, but you could look at him as a gift, as well. You’ve just had a crash course in what doesn’t make for a good partner.

But I would just like everyone’s opinions on what they think he did wrong, or whether he did anything wrong after all… then I feel I can really move on. Was he being manipulative? Was it wrong of me not to visit him during finals? Was it wrong of me to be angry that he got back together with his ex? Was it wrong of me to be so upset that he slept with her, when we weren’t “officially” a couple?
There are many great answers to these questions, and I wish iamkimiam’s was around for me many years ago. The answer to your questions above, the yes, no, no, and no are mainly because you are likely too sincere, trusting and perhaps a little naive due to age and inexperience. They shouldn’t be bad things, but in the wrong hands…well, you see. It’s a shame that getting a little toughened up when it comes to relationships equates to growing up when it comes to relationships - but this is what you just did.

posted by peagood at 5:10 AM on October 2, 2011 [1 favorite]

http://ask.metafilter.com/197409/Is-he-a-jerk-I-cant-seem-to-get-over-him